


How It Might Have Been

by NorthwesternInsanity



Category: Dokken, Music RPF
Genre: Bittersweet, Fluff, M/M, Reminiscing, Reuniting, awkward separation, owning up to mistakes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-02
Updated: 2018-05-02
Packaged: 2019-05-01 08:08:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,280
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14516037
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NorthwesternInsanity/pseuds/NorthwesternInsanity
Summary: Set in 2003. It's been two weeks since George Lynch and Jeff Pilson began work on writing new material together, as well as reuniting after several years of separation. After a long day, George and Jeff have a moment together and end up thinking about their time apart and how it feels to be back together. (Can be considered a revisiting one-shot sequel to Falling Again, but can also stand alone)





	How It Might Have Been

**Author's Note:**

> "We've taken a beating, but we're still here." -Andy Hillstrand

Two weeks down working on a project with Jeff Pilson. After the past six years and the second breakup of Dokken leading to their separation, George Lynch had thought several times that it would have never happened.

And now it was happening.

The first day, Jeff had met George at his house. George could not recall a reunion that had meant more to him.

Since then, they'd shifted to meeting up at Jeff's house, because Jeff had gotten into production and had more equipment on hand. As the ice broke, it slowly felt more natural working together again.

But tonight was a big step. Tonight was the first night George was staying over at Jeff's house so they could set off to work earlier in the day. It was the first time they'd purely hung out with each other and talked about anything not having to do with the music and their project. It was late -after midnight -and despite tiredness, neither felt like calling it a night.

"Funny, Jeff, you're usually the more talkative of us," George remarked after some time, realizing Jeff had been of few words tonight.

Jeff was sitting turned sideways toward George, relatively close, but not touching. He was leaning his head against the back of the sofa, and had been listening contently to George, but now glanced up before speaking.

"I'm tired. Sorry, it's not that it's your fault -it really isn't. This means everything to me for you to be here."

"You don't have to be sorry," George whispered. "I'm tired too."

Looking at Jeff, George could see he'd perked up a little in the eyes from their first reunion, but still had the insomniac look despite his energy bursts through the day. Jeff could also see that George seemed in exponentially better spirits, but the wear of past pain had taken its toll, and it would be a while before he really bounced back.

_We've taken a beating, but we're still here._

"Crazy, isn't it?" asked Jeff quietly.

"It feels really strange. I'm happy with it, but it's hard to process what's just happened in the last two weeks, and then the past six years. I can't make heads or tails of it." George leaned back on the sofa, gazing up at the ceiling.

"I can't either," admitted Jeff. "Maybe it just doesn't matter."

"I think what matters is that we made it here. We're sitting here together. It's still a little surreal. But I don't feel unsafe. And I don't want to be anywhere else right now, George."

"I'm sure we wouldn't necessarily have to be here in the house to be enjoying it. Other places too are good," Jeff argued. "But I'd prefer it with the two of us together, regardless."

"That is a thought. In that case, right now I wish we could go back to 1986 again, if that was possible. Remember how much fun we had together? Despite everything else?" asked George.

"If we could choose to go back and just relive it without the drugs, I'd do it in a heartbeat," Jeff declared. "Even with all the drama. Maybe it wouldn't have been as bad."

"Makes you wonder how many things would be different," George murmured. "I only wish I knew what would have been different if I hadn't gotten screwed up in the nineties."

"We can only guess now."

"I probably would have still ended up leaving Dokken -again," George admitted. "Don would have driven me crazy enough to do it at some point."

"Probably so," Jeff agreed, before snickering lightly. "Because heaven knows the two of you couldn't stay in agreement for more than a few minutes even if your lives depended on it!"

"I probably wouldn't have left you behind, the way it happened though. We'd have still been in touch and not lost all those years," George continued.

"We would have kept in touch." Jeff agreed wholeheartedly. "Though there might have been some times we wouldn't have necessarily talked a lot -with Dokken, we still had our busy moments. Those wouldn't have entirely gone away until I left just recently.

"You had a few things aside from just band business too, so that wouldn't have helped." George winced with a hint of cautious humor. "Mick made sure to even exacerbate it."

Jeff sighed. "You know, I can't really stay mad at Mick for that with Lisa. He could have thought that one over better, but he didn't. Not that I could expect him to."

George snorted. "Sounds like Mick with a lot of things to not think it all the way through."

"It really does, doesn't it?" Jeff quipped lightly, before his expression went serious again. "That's just Mick. But we were in a breakup process, and having her on tour when that had started was a mistake. Mick's not all at fault, because I know she led him on to believe we'd already officially made the split. He wouldn't have done it otherwise. It still was a bitter pill to swallow, but that wasn't what did it."

"So what did?" asked George. "I heard John Norum was getting fed up with Don. I feel him, but you let more slide."

"Don has been a little on the darker side of his personality lately," Jeff admitted. "I definitely felt the difference coming on. Given what happened with his niece, I get it -and there was stress in changing lineups again when John came back. I can't blame it on him either. I just felt like it was changing as the result of little things here and there, and it wasn't home anymore. Don told me after you left that if I ever felt the need to leave I could, because he didn't want it to build up to a point of bitterness. So I took that feeling as being the signal that it was time to move on. And I left."

"And now we're here," continued George.

"Mmm-hmm," Jeff murmured. "Now we're here."

Silence fell over the two. Simply sitting quietly and enjoying the fact that they were together again, working with each other, having a good time, and being happy for having tried it after so much time apart. Nothing needed to be said aloud between the two to prove that both were glad to be there.

And at some point after roughly ten minutes, Jeff shifted over to make contact with George's side, shifted his head from the back of the couch to George's shoulder, and lightly embraced him. He stayed in that position for several minutes before George reacted.

"I was afraid you wouldn't want to sit together like this again after everything." George cautiously pulled his arms in around Jeff, feeling like he didn't deserve the affection. "How come?"

"Because it's like we used to do," said Jeff. "I'm pretending inside that it's 1986 again here, except I'm not on drugs. And maybe this here is how it would have been in the years we missed in the nineties."

"I'd like to think it would have been this way," George admitted, "though if that's the case, I've got every reason to kick myself in the ass I haven't kicked myself for already, because I sure fucking missed the best thing in the world."

"No you didn't," murmured Jeff, curling in a tad tighter. "You only delayed it. It's happening now, even if it's only for tonight."

George sighed contentedly through his nose and rested his chin on Jeff's head. For the moment being, he felt he really hadn't missed anything as he whispered in the dim light of the lamp-lit room.

"I love you, Jeff."

"You too, George."


End file.
